Not in France cleaning the plate signals to your host or the chef that you thoroughly enjoyed your meal. In some cultures, you leave a little behind on your plate because it is considered rude to clean your plate. So, don’t complain about the length of time. Eating is a slow experience meant to be a social engagement with friends, family, and loved ones. Or, if you want to linger and take your time, you’re being timed to make room for the next table. In North America, it feels like we order and expect our food to be served immediately, then we speed eat our meal without savouring or taking our time. Cover illlustration and this illustration from itg.digital The lingering feeling of eating, talking, and spending time with your companions is the focus. Sitting down to dinner with friends or family is meant to be a process you have a cocktail or a glass of wine and multiple courses to be eaten over the night. If you want to eat as the locals do in France and experience the food culture, slow down. Nor should you devour your food without pausing to enjoy the whole experience, not just the food but also the wine, company, and conversation. If you genuinely want a fast food experience, Mc Donald’s is your best bet. When you go out for a meal in France, you cannot expect your food to be cooked and served under 30 minutes, like in North America. Eating Out and Expecting a Fast Food Timeline This is by no means an exhaustive list, but it reflects our combined observations and experiences. My hope is that recognizing some of the common faux-pas that we as visitors can make will help break this feedback loop and instead try to actively engage with locals and adapt and immerse yourself into local customs for a more authentic experience. You are left feeling irritated by the influx, at the inability to get a table at your favourite spot, or bad manners (all of them). You only have to think of a personal experience where you are from when tourists inundate your city or town. This feedback loop is that tension I noted earlier between locals and foreigners, which reinforces assumptions on both sides, leading to the faux-pas by a foreigner and the ingrained (and irritated) response by a local. Over time, these reactions become ingrained responses, which creates a feedback loop. What makes faux-pas so interesting is how often it can occur (in most cases unintentionally) and how these actions can create reactions. Some are recognizable from cultural exchanges such as films, books, or just meeting a French person. One of France’s most recognizable cultural norms is the two-kiss greeting, which is popular in other European countries but is mandatory in French culture. There are countless books written on the topic because it is so detailed and intricate. In French culture, there is a complex web of cultural norms embedded in your life from a young age. A notable example is Japan, but I will save this for another blog post. The faux-pas concept encapsulates the local-foreigner experience well, not only in France but all over the world. It has been adopted into the English language since the 16th century and other French words such as bon appétit, rendez-vous, and déjà vu. The word faux-pas translates to ‘false-step.’ Literally, it means to blunder or to make a mistake but with regards to a particular set of cultural norms. It made me feel like Parisians were quite snobby, or was it a more widespread cultural phenomenon. Initially, my first impression of France and French culture was in Paris, and it was mixed some people were helpful, while others just ignored me. This blog post was influenced by a conversation about French culture and first impressions as a visitor. During this quarantine, I’ve had the opportunity to learn more about French culture and the proper protocols to follow in various social situations and the infamous faux-pas.
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